 |
 Name: Aeria // Inês Rodrigues DoB: 13th September Where? Lisbon, Portugal Is: agnostic; doesn't care about politics; clumsy; dumb; hopelessly romantic; too much of a dreamer; imaginative; friendly; old-fashioned; overweight; dependent; dependable; mother-like; protective; jealous; easily depressed; polite; shy; helpful; obsessed with helping. Loves Business suits, roses, red, black, purple, blue, white, grey, blue eyes, grey eyes, Britain, London, english, churches, cemeteries, poetry, kisses, hugs, friends, family, good manners, quietness, music, calm, emotion, romance, glasses, fountains, abandoned places, cats, dogs, computers, water, cold, snow, ice, apples, religious stuff, priests <3, cassocks, crosses, brown hair, blonde hair, wavy hair, helping others. Hates Skimpy clothes, teenage whores, slow people, discipline, yelling, being insulted for no reason, being accused for what she didn't do, not being believed in, being cast aside, heat, the beach, fire, pain, loneliness, being afraid, seeing other people suffer.
|
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Nov 16, 2006
Hello everyone... For once, this post will be in portuguese... No, there isn't a special reason I just feel like it ^^;
There will also be no 'mood' nonsense. Sorry about that.
Ok, começa aqui o primeiro post em português deste blog! Não me parece que vá usar muitos smileys visto que isto não é o MSN, é mais uma espécie de 'diário público', onde ficam registados eventos para quem quiser tomar conhecimento dos ditos.
Eu sei que não posto nada há muito tempo e peço imensas desculpas aos leitores deste blog ( se é que tal gente sequer existe ), mas tenho andado demasiado ocupada, cansada e sem uma gota de paciência para me dar ao trabalho de escrever sobre a minha monótona vida de adolescente academicamente medíocre e esteticamente inferior.
E a elas com o post.
A escola vai bem, penso eu. Estou a gostar muito do Colégio Moderno, mesmo que a maior parte das pessoas com quem passe o tempo já esteja mais que farta da instituição. Penso que não posso ainda dizer que 'gosto muito das pessoas' visto que me dou com um pequeno grupo de colegas e metade da minha turma me goza desde o primeiro dia de aulas porque sou a) gorda, b) 'xoninhas', c) gorda e d) muito gorda. Sim, penso que se resume a isto. Às vezes pergunto-me: o que é que eu fiz a esta gente? Matei alguém para merecer que me façam chorar todos os dias e que me baixem ainda mais uma auto-estima que, penso eu, nunca cheguei sequer a ter? Mas é então que me vem a resposta à cabeça e solto um suspiro, símbolo da minha eterna paciência - não podia esperar nada diferente deles, afinal, são adolescentes.
Mas acho que já tinha falado sobre isto... não importa. Quanto ao outro assunto, não vou falar disso aqui, quem quiser que me pergunte - e isto é dirigido às pessoas que sabem ao que me refiro... ou melhor, a quem.
A Celina Reduto faltou. Dois dias seguidos. É impossível de imaginar a extrema euforia que me inundou as veias no momento em que a professora substituta abriu a porta da nossa companheira, a Sala 38. Saltei, gritei, cantei... e o pior é que não era a mais histérica dali, e em 30 pessoas não havia uma única que não estivesse a fazer uma festa monumental. Hoje de manhã foi ligeiramente mais calmo visto que ela já tinha faltado no dia anterior... Mas foi bom à mesma. Jogámos ao Stop. Deveras cómico.
Finalmente cantei na aula de canto. Sim, pode parecer estranho, mas eu tenho aulas de canto e ainda não tinha cantado. Digamos que se deram alguns contratempos no passado, impedindo-me de cantar. E estava eu muito satisfeita por isso. Digamos que sou um pouco tímida e não queria cantar à frente do Professor António Ramos. Mas até foi bom... bastante bom. Pensava que o homem só me ia colocar defeitos e dizer-me o que tinha de aperfeiçoar mas só me elogiou. É uma sensação totalmente nova, ouvir elogios de adultos...
Momentos Da Semana:
- 4ª Feira: a folha do dióspiro, a luta pela goma de coca-cola, um certo colega a olhar deliciado para 'as traseiras' do Afonso (não ando aqui a bufar ninguém...), conversa com o Afonso e o Prof. Fernando Araújo em Geometria Descritiva. Celina Faltou.
- Hoje, 5ª Feira: o jogo do Stop ( ganza, fiambre, ecoponto... ), passar gomas ao Pedro a meio da aula, a emboscada ao Pedro de manhã, a busca pelo sapato escondido, o jogo de basket com o chão molhado ( o Afonso a correr atrás da bola quando ela já ia fora, eu a fazer a esparregata porque escorreguei, pessoal a chocar uns contra os outros... ). Celina Faltou.
- 2ª Feira: ficar na escola com a Rita, conhecer a Laura (irmã do Pedro), a diversão do 'click', encorajar o 'Gang' a espancar o puto irritante, assistir à aula de dança Jazz.
Terça feira realmente não teve muito interesse. Bem, fico-me por aqui.
Músicas Do Dia:
- Don't Let Me Down [ Julian Lennon ]
- Dirty Little Secret [ Sarah McLachlan ]
- These Are The Days [ Jamie Cullum ]
Estrofes Do Dia [ escritas pela autora do blog, moi ]
Even though you always were
Too perfect for me,
You were always all that
My eyes could see.
I think I know why
We’re dying tonight
I’d be heartbroken in hell
If I lost you from sight.
So long, Goodbye, 'Til I'm willing to cry.
Vemo-nos para a próxima.
[ A ]
Posted at 03:07 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Oct 8, 2006
 Mood: Nervous // Uneasey // Yearning // Imaginative
Reason: School // Philosophy homework ._.; // ...To see them ^^; // Lots of ideas coming to mind right now, no idea where from O.o;
Song: I Can't Decide :: Scissor Sisters // Words That We Couldn't Say :: Steve Conte // Call Me When You're Sober :: Evanescence // Kuuneru Asobu :: Home Made Kazoku
Wanting To: Talk to him // Draw // Write // Hug someone
I'm so sorry everyone for not posting sooner. Gosh, I'm chaning the blog's theme too often. To be honest with you, I didn't like that banner much... ^^; I kind of like this one, though. Not as bright. I don't like bright things. Only pure white. The red in the other one was hurting my eyes @@;;
I didn't do my Philosophy homework. I'm so toast. I'll have to copy it off someone tomorrow morning.
I did more than I needed to for English, though. = =; Mweh. At least I finally bought a Pen-Drive. 2GB. I really needed one ^^; And a mousepad with a wrist-cushion. My wrists have been hurting a lot lately. I'm assuming it's due to the excess of keyboard-and-mouse usage =D; Especially my right one, since I lift it a lot to write all the time. Am doing it right now.
I really hope Afonso is liking HellSing o_o; I don't know, I get really worried that people won't like what I suggest them. I always fear they'll get a strange opinion of me or that I'll never find common tastes with that person ever again. Then again, I'm paranoid about almost everything.
Oh, before I forget:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRNO!! ^____^ MY DEAREST OLDER BROTHER IS NOW 17 YEARS OLD <3 I'M SO PROUD OF YOU >.<;
Teehee x3;
So, there isn't much to write... I'm being seriously honest now. Usually when I say this, the post ends up longer than the others <<; Mweh. I had a very boring weekend, stuck at home all day, crying like an idiot for stupid reasons that no one should worry about...
Oh yeah.
I'm going to pick up my camera tomorrow <3; Yes, I bought a lovely new camera!
And I sometimes wish my father could have the least drop of sensitivity in him. He acts really cutely from time to time but then suddenly he becomes this cold, selfish person. I don't understand how but it really hurts when I didn't do anything wrong and I'm talked to without the least of politeness or delicacy. True, I was never the perfect daughter but... I don't know. I think I don't really deserve to get ALL the rough end of his moodswings. =/
When I have moodswings, I stick to my bedroom. I only let it out if someone comes LOOKING for me. And that's their fault. I try to keep everyone from harm. Not my fault if they insist...
Another note:
I hate being sick all of a sudden. I was fine all day. I honestly, truly, deeply hate my stupid allergies.
Must... read... PeaceMaker Kurogane manga. Even though Vol. 1 is... like... so confusing. It's like... THE MIDDLE OF THE STORYLINE. I don't get these people O__o;
Anyway...
I leave you now.
Gute Nacht
[Aeria]
Posted at 02:53 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Sep 26, 2006
. S h o u j o : H e a r t .
 Mood: Very Happy // Excited // Worried // Quite Tired
Reason: I got it! ^-^ I asked for it! // x3; Fabio's a great person to talk to // Nessi and Yuna... // I didn't sleepy much ^^;
Song: Hitori Janaikara :: UVERworld ; Yasashisa no Shizuku :: UVERworld
I'm posting every single day now! I'm sure it will stop soon. I don't have much to post, I just wanted to let everyone know I already asked for their e-mails ^^ I'm sorry I made a big deal out of it but I tend to get overly nervous about everything.
I found out Fabio watches Naruto! Which actually pwns, since I thought no one in my class liked anime. Naruto's a start so I'm recording BLEACH for him. I hope he likes it.
I'm also taking HellSing to school tomorrow for Afonso to read ^^; I hope he likes it as well. Personally, it's one of my favourite 3 mangas and the only one I re-read whenever I'm bored. In my opinion, it's a million times better than the anime. Maybe that's why they made an OVA?
Back on track.
I'm getting closer to Beatriz ^-^ She's so nice and we're sitting together in every class. I'm so glad I'm not hated in that class. I mean, I probably am by some people o.o;; But not by the ones I like to talk to so I guess I'm okay with that.
Fabio liked my blog banner, yay! ^___^ *happy*
As you may have noticed, this is a very hyper post. I don't know, I don't usually feel this way... why is it? I've been so excited and happy lately. Maybe it's the wind of change or something of the sort...
I miss Kris.
She doesn't e-mail me anymore, not even when I e-mail her and she's never online. I know she has school but I do too... I would appreciate just a little bit of attention. I'm not nagging so please don't just come and flame me in my comment box saying how fucking heartless I am and other crap I couldn't care less about. I'm not mad at anyone, just sad for not getting a word out of her lately.
So yeah, go ahead and call me a fucking bitch for wanting SOME ATTENTION FROM MY SIS. -__-; Kris isn't the only one alive ,you know? I may be unconsiderate sometimes but I'm a person. JUST LIKE Kris. Not something different. Yes, this is to the person who once came and flamed me in my old blog every single fucking time I complained about Kris.
The word on my avatar, Wallpaper does not refer to the physical, on-the-walls wallpaper, not your desktop wallpaper. It is the title of a soon-to-be-comic I'm planning. Note: planning. I'm not really sure I'll even start it but I have some ideas in mind ^^ Wish me luck if I ever decide to try it.
...Happy things took place today <3 Those who know what I'm talking about, keep your mouths shut tightly. <<;
Peace Out,
[ A ]
P.S.
AI AI AI AI KOTOBA~ //O *sings*
Posted at 02:21 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Sep 25, 2006
Mood: Scared // Nervous // Inspired // Dreaming
Reason: This Nightmare I had::House // Tomorrow // Songs // My future job xD;
Song: Shounen Heart :: HOME MADE KAZOKU // Hitotsu = Unmei Kyoudoutai :: Can-Goo
There isn't much to post. Today was fairly uneventful and I'm only posting for the purpose of telling you all about this nightmare I had last night....
~ NightMare ~
I was with Nessi, alone, in an abandoned house. We were in a corridor. It was very narrow and old, there was no light whatsoever - the walls were dirty and stained, the floorboards weren't complete anymore and half-eaten by termites, displaced, and the ceiling's lamps had been broken, the ceiling itself being dirty and stained as well. The floor creaked.
We walked around for a while with our flashlights. After some time, we reached this door, creaking it open. The room was emtpy, the floor, walls and ceiling all made of stone and incredibly stained. The only thing inside was a giant bathtub. Nessi and I approached cautiously and we stared in horror at the scene - the bathtub was filled with fresh, dark blood to the brim.
Then something came up from the depths. A dead body, missing both its eyes.
I screamed in terror and Nessi dropped her flashlight. We ran out of the room and into the hallway, going down it. I closed my eyes as I ran and I cried, trying so hard to ignore the horrible, creepy dragging sounds all around me.
I finally caught a glimpse of what was making those sounds when I cleansed my eyes from tears. Ahead of me, entering through a door, this humanoid creature dragged around its extremely long, tentacle arms. It was grey and stained, and covered in open wounds, with a chain around its neck and all its long, pointy teeth pointing out. It had really small, black beady eyes.
When I looked behind me, Nessi was no longer around.
I entered a room, a new one. There were two Egyptian sarcophagus and a stone basin with fresh water. The view from the room suddenly turned into that of a camera placed at the top corner of the room. I was drinking water. Then I looked up at the camera, with an expression of deep puzzlement, and instead of tears I was crying blood.
Then the 'screen' was filled with interference, and then it went off.
A few seconds later, there I was again, opening my eyes. I found myself in the middle of an abandoned fairground, laying down on dirt and grass. It was so dark, everything was lit only by the moonlight... The same dragging noises were heard but faint. Suddenly, Yuna came running up to me, holding a camera. She told me we had to go home, and that she couldn't find the door back out.
We walked around until the dragging noises grew stronger. Eventually, we hid behind the pillars of the Ferris Wheel.
We waited there, until I looked behind me. It was all so horribly pitch-black. I could still see some ground far up ahead and a wooden crate, but then everything faded into pitch-black darkness. I turned to Yuna but then I began hearing this EXTREMELY loud, EXTREMELY acute metallic chime. When I turned back to the darkness, I saw it.
It was a human form, but only the form. No clothes, no hair, nothing, just the basic form of a person. It was hopping very slowly, almost as if it floated and it was white, pure, sparkling white... and glowing. There was a white, glowing little blob floating next to it. The chiming grew louder and louder.
I began trembling uncontrollably, and I screamed. A scream of pure horror.
~
And then I woke up ^^;
There's nothing else to say at the moment. Tomorrow I'll ask everyone's e-mails. Wish me luck.
Peace Out
[ A ]
Posted at 03:08 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Sep 24, 2006
 Mood: Romantic // In Pain // Inspired // Musical
Reason: Something... most of you know. // My arms // Wrote a poem. // Sweetbox <3
Listening To: Liberty; Sorry; 1000 Words; Far Away; Chyna Girl :: Sweetbox
Hyped On: Music; GetBackers; "I, Lucifer"; Angels, Demons, The Divine & The Occult; Kazuki
Wanting To: Watch GB ; Read ; Talk to Nessi ; Go to school
Hello yet again. I have been posting regularly lately, I believe... So I'll probably try to keep it up for the next few weeks. I'm not saying I will, I'm saying I'll try. So don't nag at me for not posting during a week or more saying 'You said you would!' or anything of the sorts.
This weekend was (or has been since it's not quite over yet) fairly uneventful. Except for Friday but I'm not sure that really counts as weekend... I took my free afternoon (a free afternoon is when you don't have classes in the afternoon; there are also free mornings but I don't have any) and went shopping with Yuna in Colombo. We didn't buy too many things, just a few CDs, matching plaid red ties with a crown and matching pins. But then we got this makeshift on-the-spot plan to get her to sleep over that night. We called our parents and bang. She slept over.
We watched Sleepy Hollow. It's an amazing movie <3 I, personally, adored it. Yuna slept through half of it but I couldn't bring myself up to awaking her. She's not used to sleeping only a couple of hours ^^; We spent half of Saturday together until she went back home. Mom and Dad were out of the house from 2pm to 10pm... I was alone for five hours (Yuna left at 5pm). Not that it mattered much, I enjoy being alone and it's not like I do anything I don't do when there's people in the house.
Well. Now that the data report is over, I will dedicate this post to talking about feelings. Yes, I know "Geez, she's such a girl, always going on about how she feels and whatever. We don't really care, goddamnit!". *sigh* That's the reason why none of my guy friends read my blog ^^; Oh well. I couldn't really care less, since I know my best friends do read it.
So, anyway, here it goes:
Feelings
Hate
I don't think I can say I have ever hated anyone. I think it's so hard to hate someone. It's true, I dislike things people do, and there are some people I don't like... But to the point of hating? I don't think so. Everyday, you go around and you hear most people just going "God, I hate that guy!" "I hate her!" and things of the sort. Don't you all think the word hate is a bit too strong? Hatred is something not to be joked about. Honestly, I can't seem to understand how people find it so easy to hate one another. In all 15 years of my life (I know it's not much), I have never felt hatred for anyone... Why do I find it so hard when it's so easy for everyone else? Am I simply too soft? Or are other people too spiteful?
Too much evil in this world is created through Hatred. Is it that hard to reject that feeling? Because I find accepting it a much harder thing to do.
Sadness
Something so easily attained and that so easily destroys us. It can come to you for any reason, in any way, in various degrees of depth. I can personally admit I feel sad most of the time, for various reasons: thinking of things I shouldn't, worrying over others, sad events, etc. Many people succumb to sadness and eventually let themselves be consumed by it. This is what I believe depression to be. The loss of happiness. The loss of will to live. The loss of ability to smile or enjoy anything. And, sometimes, as it has happened to me, the loss of ability to cry. It's alright to give in to sadness. It is nothing to be ashamed of, unlike what most people think. It's okay to be sad, it's okay to accept things aren't right. But we must be strong, and even if we cry, we mustn't let ourselves be tricked into suicide. Because even though you're sad now, who knows you won't become happier in a year or two? Would you really waste decades of possible happy moments, laughter, love... Just to stop that one pain? I understand those who think about suicide, at least those I know whose lives consist of... well, basically, a lot of crap. But please, don't kill yourselves. Probably, good things will come your way... And if you ever think of giving in to sadness, think of this: there are people who love you deeply... would you throw away your life just to heal your pain and end up causing an even greater pain to the people you love? Wouldn't that be selfish?
There's nothing else I can say on this subject... Only one other thing:
Cry your heart out when you want to. It's okay to cry. Because it just shows you're human, like everyone else, and not a heartless b*tch.
Loneliness
Something that torments me without having a reason to. There are many kinds of lonely - feeling that you have no friends, feeling romantically alone, feeling that no one cares for you... Just like sadness, it's okay to feel lonely. It doesn't mean that you don't appreciate the people who care for you, it just means you feel cold inside for no particular reason. And if you're really lonely... well, there's nothing to explain there. I feel lonely all the time, I know it's stupid because I have so many friends I care about and who care for me... but just like I said, it's natural... I guess the kind of lonely I feel is the romantically lonely kind. Because I've never been in a relationship, nor have I ever been in love... And being the romantically-obsessed person I am, it's the thing I crave most in this world - love. Yet I will never have it. So, it's okay to feel lonely even when you're not. I understand it perfectly, I've been there. There's this cold taking over you, starting in your lungs and spreading to your back and arms... And you find yourself wishing so hard for a hug from anyone.
Cling to those you love, who love you back. Life is a gift, enjoy it surrounded by those important to you.
Love
The final one. The most elusive, the most confusing, and The One To Rule Them All.
I can't talk about it. I've never known love... But I'm not sure if I have been feeling it lately. Everyday, all the time, I feel confused, sad and excited, all at the same time. I find myself longing earnestly for the few minutes that I can be near him and that I can hear him speak and see him smile... I've known him for so little time, so it's probably just a crush completely based on appearances. But I can't bring myself up to eating properly - I'm not hungry anymore - and I can feel like crying and shrieking in excitement in the same minute. It's something so rare, true love, and the tricky thing is... when it's finally there in front of you, you might not even notice and let it go. That's the thing that scares me the most... And that I don't wish for anyone to go through.
You get butterflies in your stomach when you see that person.You can't bring yourself up to talking to him/her. You dream of that person, even when you've only known him/her for a few days.You think of that person most of the time, and you don't know why.You're feeling so many things at once, you've never felt like that before.You look for that person in a crowd, no matter where you are.You long to see that person the next day, even if you're not going to talk to that person.You wonder if that person is going through the same as you.You wonder if that person has anyone to call their own.You wish for that person to smile at you.
This is what I think of love. And if this is all true... then I'm in for a feared yet expected surprise.
Never let yourself go. You are what you feel. But there are some feelings you must fight against, and some feelings you must fight for. Be true to yourself, and never forget who you are.
Now, I leave you with something I wrote:
.:: Please Tell Me ::.
Even when the sky was falling
I came back to see how you were
Even if I only watched you from afar. When everything was burning,
You were the first thing I thought of
And how I'd like to hold you, in silence. Even though I never talk to you
I still see you in my dreams
Even though I'm not sure if it's love. It's the first time, at least I think
I've ever liked someone like this
But if it's the first time, how can I know? Please [ onegai ], tell me [ oshiete kure]
How can I answer my own questions?
How can I ever know if I should hold on? Why? [ doushite ] Now, why? [ ima no, doushite? ]
I long for the short time I can listen to your voice
Even if I'm not the one you're talking to, I hear your words. Closely, so closely I pay attention
And let myself wander in both envy and craving
Why do you do everything so perfectly? It's infuriating. It's all so confusing right now,
So why? [ doushite ] And how?
Can anyone tell me what this is
Because I really can't decide
Should I seek this out
Or sit and wait
For it to fade? Please [ onegai ], tell me [ oshiete kure ]
Should I smile at you or look away?
Please [ onegai ], tell me [ oshiete kure ]:
Who are you to me?
Peace Out. Heil, herr Führer.
[ A ]
Posted at 12:04 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Sep 20, 2006
. V e n u s - I n - T h e - D a r k .
Mood: Confused::Depressed::Hyper // Happy // Romantic // Inspired
Reason: ...I think I like someone for the first time. I'm not sure. // Everything's going well except for... *points back* // *points back as well* // I don't know. Just am. ^^;
Hyped On: Drawing // Music // Drawing Class // Get Backers // Romance
Wanting To: Draw // Watch Get Backers // Ask for everyone's e-mails
Listening To: Venus in the Dark :: Mika Nakashima // Will :: Lisa // Yuuyami Suusaido :: PIERROT
Weird mood, huh? I don't really have much to say. I'm afraid of who might read this, considering I'll probably be giving the link to my classmates...I don't know... Anyway, I'm not really sure about it but I think I like someone. Why am I not sure? Because... well, I know it's weird seeing as I'm 15 years old, but I've never liked anyone before.
Well... yeah...I really don't know. I'm sorry for those who read this but I really am confused. I'm almost jumping up in joy inside waiting to look at him again during class and talk to him. Even if I shouldn't, everyone talks anyway xD;
But... *sigh* I'm... I'm so confused and half-depressed because... well, I'm not particularly a fairly good catch. I'm not very bright, I'm not healthy and I'm certainly more than considerably ugly. Not to mention my excessive amount of LARD. - -; And he's handsome and cute, and funny and we share most of our tastes... Not to mention he's as good as me, probably even better, in my areas of expertise.
Those who know about this are probably laughing their asses off <_<; LAUGH AWAY! SOMEDAY YOU'LL SEE WHEN A BOMB DROPS RIGHT ON YOUR HEAD.
...Or not.
I'm talking about Nessi and Saki (and Yuna but she doesn't really understand the situation) who are continually telling me I have a chance and that I like him. Well, I don't know if I do okay?! Plus... due to the aforementioned reasons, I would never ever have a chance.
What should I do? I e-mailed Kris-chan about it but she completely ignored me and went on about the Steve Irwin memorial... The most important thing that ever happened to me and she completely ignored it. I feel so, so hurt ._.; It's like... nothing about me matters anymore, she knew how freaking nervous I was for my first day and she didn't even sound excited when I finally talked to her about it. I don't know what to do, did I do something wrong to lose that kind of attention?
Or maybe I'm just being overly-sensitive.
Again.
I swear my sensitivity will bring forth my downfall one day. Something like:
Person: OH MY GOD SOMETHING HORRIBLE JUST HAPPENED TO ME, I NEED A HUG ;_;
Me: ;___; Awww! *goes*
Person: *OMGSTABZ*
Me: *OMGDED*
Or something of the sort.
I don't have anything else to type right now, talking to Nessi and being yelled at by MOM *glares towards living room* even if I do start classes later tomorrow.
I don't know what to do. I can't even talk to the guy ouside the classroom... I'm such a loser. He'd never like someone like me... Ever ._.
Take Care,
Aer-chan
P.S.
http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/40127833/
Take a look at that, please x3;
P.P.S.
Nessi, I'm sure everything will turn out to be better than it looks. Trust me, when I'm optimistic, which is very rare, I'm usually right ^-^ You know I'm always here for you, no matter the odds, and sorry for being a fucking idiot and making you feel worse sometimes. I hope you forgive me. I love you a lot, you're my other half, my opposite, the other side of the mirror... You should know I care a lot about you, hell, as much as I care for my family... And that I would never intentionally hurt you.
Please, let me stay by your side... Even if I suck sometimes, I can try over and over again until I get it right. Please, just let me stay with you. I'm sure everything will get better soon ^_^
Posted at 04:40 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Sep 18, 2006
Mood: Cheerful // Very Tired // Romantic // Inspired // Confident
Reason: First day was quite good // Didn't sleep // <3 Just am // Same. Just am. // This game I just finished playing.
Hyped On: GetBackers [ Kazuki::MakubeX::Akabane ]
Wanting To: Watch GetBackers // Draw something decent // Sleep
Listening To: Este :: Okiayu Ryuutarou // Karin :: Souchiro Hoshi // Innocence :: Melody of Oblivion Soundtrack
Hello everyone! It's been a long time since I last posted! I had a nice bithday, to all those who were wondering about that (I bet not many since the only people who have a link to this, I talk to them over MSN). I had lunch at the japanese restaurant with Yuna and Nessi, then we went to El Corte Inglés because it was raining too hard to go to the Chiado area TT-TT; But it turned out to be a great choice! We bought lots of cute things for school and we ended up going to watch the movie You, Me and Dupree. Because I wanted to xD; It was funny, I liked it ^-^ After that I bought this horse plushie. It's so cute <3
I got the seal plushie from the Nessi! The one I had asked my dad to give me but he wouldn't. And she didn't even know! x3; *hugs Nessi* Thank you <3
I got Escada's Magnetism from Yuna. It smells sooo good *3*; I wore it on Friday for my b-day dinner.
Mom and Dad gave me Sharapova's wristwatch, the white Tag Golf from TAG Heuer. I was hysterical. ;_; And now it's already full of scratches gah, I feel so bad... *cries*
I also got some money from grandma and grandpa, a plushie from Inês Azevedo and Luísa with a wonderfully moving card and a photo of us girls in the gala night ( TT Thank you, girls! ) and a painting set from Francisco! *-*; With acrylic paint and all. It must have been so expensive Dx
Friday was my birthday dinner, blahblah... Nothing big, only eight people but it was awesome <3 The important people came (except for Miguel TT; We should go out to dinner at Olivier again some other day x3 ). We had, at least I had, so much fun <3 Thank you for coming, Nessi, Yuna, Inês, Luísa, Rita and Francisco.
Saturday was time to go to Anipop! I finally stayed more than a minute with Mary! ;-; I was happy, very happy! I GOT MY AIBA CD! I GOT MY AIBA CDDDDDDD~ ;___; I WAS SO HYSTERICAL (*coughwas?cough*). THANK YOU CHRNO-NII-CHAN ;____; *GLOMPS*
And I got a Gaara t-shirt <3 The last one. Someone else wanted it and the girl at the counter said I had bought it HAHAHAHAHA *cackle*
And lots of dangly BLEACH things including these cute phone straps <3 And two Howl's Moving Castle figurines, this guy was going to buy the scarecrow and I wanted it, so he said I could have it x3;
So yeah, we spent some time with everyone... It was SO good to see all my friends again <3 I spent most of my time with Maria, Lyna, Nessi and Sakura =3; It was so much fun, I like them a lot ^_^ Arche, Kaoru and Kiku have a LOT of bottled up energy, I can't understand how they could keep up their energetic dancing for so long o.o;
Sunday was spent at the computer... so no biggie there. Today, Monday the 18th of September I finally started my classes at Colégio Moderno.
And you know what?
I was a jerk.
Everyone was so nice to me today. When I got there, I was a bit early so the door to the Computers classroom wasn't yet open so the people I later found out to be my classmates were just sitting around.
This guy and a few other girls came to say hello almost instantly, asking if I was the new student, introducing themselves and saying I'd be in their class. I later got to talk to Mafalda and Maria João, who were extremly nice and funny, and I'm sitting next to Beatriz Morgado, a very nice girl ^-^;
My English teacher rocks xD My Computers teacher is very nice x3; but my Philosophy teacher is a nightmare ;_; She's just... gah TT; She scares me and (I think) everyone else.
Oh well. Maybe she'll get better with time? Or maybe it's just a first impression. ^^;
Thank you everyone for your concern, and thank you Nessi for trying to keep me optimistic.
*points* YOU WERE RIGHT ALL ALONG. HAPPY NOW?! XD;
I'll be going now! ^-^
Love,
Aer-chan
P.S.
I WANT KAAAAAZUKI DX AND MAKUBEX. And I want to work with Akabane because he just pwns x3; *huggles Kazuki and MakubeX and Akabane plushies*
Posted at 11:18 am by Aeria
Permalink
Sep 9, 2006
. D e s c e n d - O n - M e .
 Mood: Romantic // Confused // Eager::Nervous
Reason: Does this every change? // Yuna... should I tell her? // Starting highschool at a new school soon.
Song: Another Grey Day In The Big Blue World :: Maaya Sakamoto // Dream Brother :: Jeff Buckley
Hello everyone.
I'm sorry I didn't post sooner but I only came back home a week ago and I haven't felt really up to it.
Greece was okay, I guess. I love that country. We went to pretty cool places, even though I'd been there before we went to different spots of the country... Except for Athens, but we can't help go back there. I hope I go back yet again.
We went to Santorini, Mykonos, Athens and Cape Sounio, to those who are interested ^^;
Now that I am back, I have to select the photos I like, zip them up and upload them and put the link here for download =3; Though I doubt anyone would care xD;
Anyway, this post will be rather short because I'm quite tired ^^; I went back-to-school shopping yesterday with Yuna. We had so much fun x3; There's this new collection of accessories and such called Coolcat and it's so pretty, all in greys and white and black, and always the same cats. We bought matching Pucca pencilcases, some dangly things from Coolcat and Bad Boy (another new brand we saw)... I bought some notebooks and two binders and nothing else, I think. I used my debit card for the first time... It's so much fun! x3; To pay without using actual, physical money, I mean.
She also slept over on Thursday to Friday. We had fun. We didn't watch anime or anything, just TV... and talked, I guess. It was fun, nonetheless. ^^;
I finally met Selina. I've been wanting to talk to her for a while now, for everything I've heard about her and such. She's even nicer than I thought, if that is humanly possible ^-^; Though I'm quite worried about her, she suffers a lot and I don't know how to help TT-TT;
I miss Nessi, she's in Tomar... She's coming back on the 10th, I think.
Wednesday, the 13th is my Birthday.
I am not looking up to it.
My birthdays always go wrong. Maybe it's the 13... Whatever. It always goes wrong and I end up crying and wishing that day had never happened.
Monday the 18th I start Highschool.
In a new, private school called Colégio Moderno.
I'm starting Singing lessons, Fencing, Advanced English, Italian and continuing with Tennis.
I'm nervous, because I don't think anyone will accept me there... socially, I mean.
I was feeling like crap last night, but for a very selfish reason ^^; It has to do with Yuna, Za and Sasuke... I'm not going to post it here, but let's say I spent many hours crying because of jealousy and loneliness and my stupid obsession with romance. I hate myself sometimes ._.;
Thankfully, Saki and Lhy were there for me <3 Thank you both ;-; Without you I wouldn't have been able to smile last night and fall asleep... You listened to me and helped me and cheered me up after that. You're the greatest <3
I have to thank Nessi too even though she's not here to read this. XD; I have to thank her for her support as well because she did a great job herself as well ^^
And this place still needs some buttons. Saki will kill me if I don't get some soon xD;
Anyhow, leaving now ^^ I'll leave you with a poem I wrote the other day ^^;
[ x ] D e s c e n d O n M e [ x ]
It’s oh so cold outside
Tonight
And your eyes just closed
For the last time
So I feel oh so lost
In fright
I guess I’m doomed to wander
The night.
Why won’t you descend on me?
With all your sensibility.
Soft-spoken words, politeness abound
Even when you’re not around.
Why won’t you descend on me?
With all your painful honesty
With all your words, ever so sweet
So sharp they make you bleed.
So why won’t you descend on me?
With your forsaken sympathy
So please, just please, descend on me
I’m no longer your enemy.
Many times I’ve tried to close
My eyes
Damp from tears and the rain
Outside
From when you ripped my chains
Away
And I was left to wander,
Astray.
Why won’t you descend on me?
With all your sensibility
Warm poetry in prose, leaving your lips
Even when I know nothing fits.
Why won’t you descend on me?
With all your painful honesty
Everything is either wrong or gone
And you still tell me to move on.
So why won’t you descend on me?
With your forsaken sympathy
So please, just please, descend on me
You’re the only thing I see.
The rain falls all the same
Even if we’re both down
We’ll never reach the hall of fame
None of us will wear the crown.
Now that you’ve descended on me
And we’re both stuck to the ground
I need your sensibility,
Painful honesty and sympathy
To lift my head and look around.
We’re forsaken, we’re both forsaken
So… why did you descend on me?
So ^^; This is goodbye until I post again x3;
Please comment on this post if you read the poem ^-^;
Byebye <3
A e r - c h a n
P.S.
Hang on there, Selina-san TT;
Posted at 04:23 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Aug 5, 2006
. F o r e v e r l a n d .
Mood: Happy // Romantic // Obsessed // Emotional // Musical
Reason: Explained in the post ^^ // Near and L // Near, L and Death Note // Explained as well. // These songs~
Song: Hallellujah - Jeff Buckley ; Existentialism on Prom Night - Straylight Run
Book: Deception Point ; Death Note ;
HOMGFOSHIZZLE=O
...
Okay. Randomness xD; Nevermind. It's 3am so you can't really blame me, and if you want to, I'll shove a sewer pipe up your ass ^_^
After hitting Lhy's Bucket with a baseball bat and running after it along the highway, being shown Near's special toys (*COUGH*) and being turned into a dog, I can say I've had a pretty good day.
There's not much to post, however, since not many things happened since the last time I posted.
Remember the people I mentioned in my last post? I decided to make them a tribute, to show them how much I love them and how dear they are to me.
.:: I Love You ::.
There it is ^-^ Please look at it and tell me what you think in my comment box ^o^ Since those mentioned in the wallpaper already commented xD; *hugs her dearest friends* <3
No, seriously. I can't even begin to describe how important you people are to me. Maybe I continuously feel the need to type this over and over because I've been overly emotional and overly sensitive these last few days but... I don't know. I think I haven't shown you how much I need you and love you, admire you, respect you, trust you and... how much you actually mean to me. I'm sorry I suck at these things. I can't live without you people. TT; Thank you Nessi, Saki, Lhy, Pan, Kris, Lena and Yuna for all your care, support, trust and affection.
I can never really repay you so you all have my eternal servitude ( this does NOT mean I'll wash your dishes - your windows, maybe, you dishes, never ).
...*cries*
I hate myself for being so emotional TT; Anyway =D; *continues*
AHAHAHAHAHA I'M SO FREAKING HAPPY AND HONORED AND EMOTIONAL TT;
Saki, Lhy, Pan and Alex have been best friends for a long time now and they are best friends in real life as well. So, since they're such close and good friends, they made a group-blog together not so long ago. I was really happy for them at the time, because it meant they had a friendship strong enough to have a 'group-diary', something that used to be done around teenagers - you write in the notebook then the week after that, your friend writes in it. This is a more modern version but it still fits, so I was really happy they had one since they're best friends.
Yesterday night, Lhy and Pan asked me to join them.
I was shocked.
I was paralized.
I was honored.
I was grateful.
I cried my eyeballs out.
So yeah... I'm really really emotional about this, since I can't really say how damn grateful I am and how honored I feel to be part of their group. I'm really so happy I could jump in joy and yes, I actually did cry in case you're thinking I was just using a figure of speech.
THANK YOU, EVERYONE TT; YOU CAN NEVER UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THAT INVITATION MEANT TO ME. ;;
So yeah. x3 I joined ^___^ *is very very happy* I feel bad because they had to change the theme because of me TT; The new theme is Shuffle!, an anime we're all hyped on - even after having watched it some time ago - and I get to keep my favourite character who happens to be a lot like me xD; Kareha.
Lhy is Asa
Pan is Lisianthus
Saki is Kaede
Alex is Nerine.
I really have to put up a Links Section ôo;; This just won't do xD;
I'm completely obsessed with DeathNote because of Nessi. DAMN YOU, WOMAN, DAMN YOU TO HELL! *shakes angry fist*
I was really, really upset for a while after L died .___. I really liked him... a lot. << >>; If you get what I mean xD;
So yeah, I was upset. And I still am.
But I found some consolation in Near. <3 Oh my god. *hugs him* I love Near. I really love Near x3 I'm SO keeping him xB *keeps Near* <33
Guh.
But I preffered Raito/Light in cute-mode.
He's suck a fucking bastard in psycho-mode. And scary too.
And Mello is disgusting. Though he has a cool jacket in his first appearance.
I want the Death Note movie. xD; Fujiwara Tatsuya, who plays Light, has these gorgeous eyes <33
So yeah.
I have nothing else to write...
I finally talked to Kris for like, 15m today. It was enough for me, I was so damn worried about her operation... TT; I'm glad she's okay, still a little woozy from anesthesia, but it'll wear off ^_^ I'm so glad she's okay. *sigh*
Okay so xD;
Peace Out <3
A - c h a n
[ Lhy gave me that nickname and I love it x3]
P.S.
THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME JOIN YOUR GROUP-BLOG, GIRLS ;; *GLOMPS*
Posted at 07:05 pm by Aeria
Permalink
Aug 3, 2006
. B a r a N o K i j o u .
Mood: Very Emotional // Lonely // Romantic // Dreaming
Reason: Have been crying all day // I just feel that way. // As always. // ._. As always.
Book: Deception Point :: Dan Brown
Song: Hands in the Sky (Big Shot) :: Straylight Run // Precious Things :: Tori Amos // California :: Phantom Planet
Works: http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/37342387/, http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/37341841/, http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/37179629/
Love: Ohtori Kyoya
I'm sorry for not posting yesterday but I wasn't in a good mood... at all. I had a fight with Nessi that continued on until today but it's solved out now. Something horrible happened to me at the meeting with some friends at the mall and it made me feel like shit. It was my last day to talk to Kris and dad was yelling at me to get off 15m after she had arrived.
So yeah, things weren't going pretty well, and I was crying hard enough as it was before he barged into my room and began yelling that I didn't respect him and that if I didn't get off he'd ground me off the computer. Leaving in the middle of a fight with one of the five people most important to you in the whole world ( parents included ) kind of gets to you.
But (I hope) it's okay now.
The links up there^ *point* are for poems that I wrote in the last three, or two days. Please read them if you have the patience. If you do, either comment on the deviations, on my tagboard or comment area for this post *points down*.
I slept around two hours so I'm really really tired. I should have slept during the afternoon but Nessi was here and I wanted to solve the problems we had so I stayed online. Then we solved them but since... I didn't want to waste the little time we had, I didn't go. And now I don't want to go. So yeah, I'll probably get off a bit earlier today and sleep late tomorrow.
I finally managed to start talking to Lena-chan again! I was SO happy! I missed her so so so much ;-; My Leninha-chan! *glomps her* God. Life was so different without you! *hugs*
Apparently we had an e-mail mix-up so she had my new email in her account but I never came online O.o; So I went to my old account, she added it again and now we're back together xD Wheee~! x3 I really missed you, Lena-chan! ^o^ I'm so glad I found you... again XD;
I got myself some new brushes from DeviantART, a few nice ones with roses included. ^^ The problem is, I have no graphics to make, so whoever wants to request anything... be my guest XD; I'm all ears... and photoshop o-o; But I really suck at Graphics so, it's okay if you don't want my crap xDDD
Wheee, Cosmos just started playing. I swear I have a passion for this song o-o; I keep putting it on Repeat. xD; It's this song, California by Phantom Planet and Do Your Thing by Basement Jaxx. ^-^
I should really go look for my felt-tip case o-o; I really really need it and I have no idea where I put it Oo;
Oh wait.
I just found it. o-o; *was messing with her drawer while typing* XD
I really recommend the movie Over the Edge, a really really cute and funny animation movie. ^^ I really liked Hamilton the squirrel xD He was so cute x3 And Stella XDD And the baby porcupines were the cutest, sugariest things ever...
After Honey-sempai o-o;
Anyway ^^ You really should watch the movie =) Yuna and I were the oldest people in the room, not counting moms and babysitters. <<; But who cares! We liked the movie.
Ah well o.o;
Not much else to say ^_^
I just want to take a few seconds to thank my friends... my most important people, those who take up my entire heart and deserve everything I can ever do for them.
They are my most important friends and those I would give my all to please.
Nessi
Kris
Yuna
Saki
Lena
Lhy
Matos
Inês Azevedo
Force (though I stopped talking to him ._. I'm sorry for not saying anything but you seem so down lately I don't know how to help, I prefer to stay silent and let you rest uu; I'm sorry. )
Thank you all for all that you've done for me and for keeping me alive. You are the ones who made me stand up and go on every single time I tripped on myself and fell facefirst on the ground. You put up with my crying, my yelling, my moodswings, my selfishness... I never thought I'd have people like you that would stay with me despite all my faults.
Thank you for everything... All I can hope for is that someday I can pay you back for all that you've done.
Peace Out,
[ A ] e r i a
Posted at 07:38 am by Aeria
Permalink
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
